Holy Gondal Empire
 | |
| Server info | |
|---|---|
| Status | Active |
| Invite link | https://discord.gg/hawktuah |
| Users | 250+ |
| Owner | ara, Heckknok and everr |
| History | |
| Founded | July 14th, 2024 |
| Founder | ara |
The Holy Gondal Empire is the latest server in Gondal's story. It was formed by merging two split-off servers, Kevinia and Red Cup Conspiracy, after Gondal: From The Ashes was archived due to constant raids by pedophiles who spammed child pornography on the former server. The latest entry in Irony servers, bringing it back from the dead!
Server Workings
Political System
There is 4 types of political role in Gondal as a whole. The President, The Vice President, the Council, and the Low council. In this section, methods of obtaining them will be explained. As will the voting system, and voting rules.
- President
To become eligible for the president role, you must be the leader of a political party. Political parties are a collective group that anyone can create, as long as they have a flag, a set of ideals and goals for the server, and a nominated vice president.
Upon creating a valid political party, a party role is created in the parties name, and is given to those who pledge allegiance to it.
When elections start, these parties are placed into a vote, and whatever party with the most votes will have their leader elected as the president of the server. Presidential terms last 2 weeks, in which another election will be held.
- Vice President
The vice president method is a little more complicated.
All party leaders must nominate a respective vice president for their party, and these people will be placed into the vice president vote.
Another way of obtaining a vice president is when a presidential runner-up fails the election, they are also placed into the vice president vote for a second chance at power.
Vice presidential terms last 2 weeks as well.
- Council
The council are a seperate entity from the presidential government. They are there to represent the people, and if they decide a president is not good enough, they can collectively come together to vote to impeach said president, and in the event of that, the elected vice president will take over. There will only ever be an odd number of council, to avoid ties in a vote. Typically this number is 5.
To apply for council, all you have to do is state that in the respective channel. You will automatically be added to the votes.
If a president is impeached and the elected vice takes over, council is not allowed to impeach the new president, They must let their term run to the end.
Council terms are only a week long, meaning a president and vice president will see 2 sets of council in their runtime.
- Low Council
The low council is not a role you can apply or vote for, it is more of a reward. To gain low council, you must be among either the top active members, editing the irony wiki, boosting or among the top people with the most invites to the server. The term lenth for low council is the same as regular council, 1 week long.
- Voting System
The voting system is done in 2 parts, within 2 days.
The first day is the President and Council votes. At the end of this vote, the 5 council who win will be elected immediately, as will the president.
On the 2nd day, it is simply a vice president vote. The nominees would include the vice presidents chosen by the party leaders, and the presidential run-ups who failed to be elected on the first poll. Similarly to the president poll, this poll will only have 1 winner. There is no guarantee that the elected vice president will be from the same party as the elected president, they may even be political rivals
- Voting Rules
The only rule is there must be absolutely zero rigging of the votes. People found to be rigging will be disqualified.
Sabotage and political wars are fully encouraged because its hilarious.
Season 0: Red Kevinian Cup
07/14/2024 - The Conception
During this date, three great minds came together with a simple idea: a server merge of the greats. Ara, representing Gondal: From the Ashes, Heckknok, representing Red Cup, and Everr, representing Kevinia come together to create a father server, hosting both many newgens and many controversies. The merge seemed successful as newgens and oldgens alike joined the new server and made it active, reviving the spirit of the old server.
Season 1: Holy Gondal Empire
7/15/2024 - Patryk Vs. Stndpzng
For the first event of Holy Gondal Empire as we know it, Gondalian Administration decided to start big. It was to be a sort of gladiatorial battle for reintegration into Gondal, a vc battle for the very right to live. In one corner you had Patryk Kornatowski, a verifiable juggernaut, weighing in at over 372 pounds and perhaps one of, if not the, greatest lolcow in irony history. Arrested for uncountable crimes, including drinking his own bodily fluids, covering himself in shit, attempting to dox several high ranking members, and having a questionable presence with sexual content featuring underage characters. In the other corner is the Las Vegas native and elder Gondalian Standpissing, a formerly highly influential man involved in many of the greatest Irony servers and Irony movements. He is held on trial for explaining Gondal lore to his IRL crush, hanging out with trannies, and worst of all just generally being annoying as shit. The two had feuded in the past, Standpissing having been involved with an 8chan hacker who threatened Patryk's life and home address. This was more personal. On the day of the 15th, Patryk had developed a habit of muting everyone else in the vc and just talking to himself, something that proved detrimental during the battle. When Standpissing arrived, Patryk was already distressed, making Standpissing's job very easy. Due to everyone being muted by the contestants the best way to communicate with them was through spamming general chat, causing it to look closer to a Twitch chat than a conversation. The turnout was good, around 15 or so people arrived and multiple were recording the event. Patryk was up against the ropes for the majority of the match. He had muted himself and would just sit there as Standpissing racked up "points" and occasionally attempted to reason with him. Patryk would only unmute to spout lines either given to him by Heckknok or taken from the spammed general chat. Multiple times Patryk would receive very important tips and tricks from the adoring crowd such as Standpissing's many home addresses including local Sears, Taco Bell, and IHOP locations, they also helped Patryk avoid 8chan hacking attacks by turning his camera on and unmuting. Despite these efforts, the villainous and evil Standpissing still had the clear lead. It took a 3rd quarter pep talk from Cliff Burkett to inform Patryk of his upcoming loss and to remind him of the stakes of the situation to get our good ol' Autistic King to kick into hyper drive. What happened next was beyond description. Patryk turned on his camera, took off his shirt, donned his Iconic V for Vendetta mask, and began to shake his large drooping breasts for all to see. This clearly blew Standpissing out of the water and he had no hope of recovering. Somehow, Patryk had done it, to the applause of all of his adoring fans in the server, and Standpissing was vanquished forever. All of this footage exists somewhere and Everr is supposed to have edited by now. Please harass Everr until his video is done.
7/17/2024 - The Sam Houston Incident(s)
Wry, who already was known for his simple trolling, decided to take things up a notch on the night of July 17th, 2024, by forcing WigWav to send a virus-infected Patryk visual novel to Patryk himself via his Discord DMs, Patryk decided to download it and boot it up, but after downloading and unzipping it he realized that it wasn't working. He then told WigWav that it wasn't working only for him to tell Patryk that it was made with Windows 11, so he was going to have to fix it and send the correct version for Patryk's operating system, which is Windows 10. Unbeknownst to him was a "nice" little surprise, which was a virus that stole ALL of his personal information, passwords, accounts that he didn't bother using anymore, etc. Wry then got into Patryk's Discord account and pretended to be the ghost of American general, statesman and former president of Texas, Sam Houston, who is best known to have taken part in the Texas Revolution. He then started spamming porn, including spamming various usages of the N word everywhere, even going as far as posting Patryk's phone number on one server he is apart of. At this point, Patryk's account seemed to be in complete jeopardy when Wry messaged a random e-whore via Patryk's account, asking if he can get some feet pics. Patryk was very shocked and angered at this, so much so, that he started to call Wry gay, saying that he wanted him to fuck his dad, Bangshakalaka, etc. He even made a PSA for people to block him, going into detail with what Wry has done so far and to avoid him at all costs. Eventually he did stop, but not quite just yet, since he then started to leak some of Patryk's passwords under the alias "wudie" onto the server. He tried infiltrating some of his accounts that he leaked the passwords to, but luckily, Patryk changed the passwords to those accounts because NOBODY wants someone to get into there accounts without permission. Wry showed proof to Patryk that he had ALL of his passwords via a group chat he had made to show how much control he really had over him. He would then force Patryk to apologize for being a pedophile that it went SO FAR into the extreme, that he got him to say that he was 11 years old, which violates Discord's ToS. Unfortunately, Patryk's account was terminated as a result, eventually making a new account. However that account would end up getting hacked too since WigWav gave Patryk a so-called "anti-virus".
Patryk tried enabling Two-Factor Authentication (2FA) on his new account, but it seemed to fail, leading to the decision of deleting the account. Although the hacker told him not to, Patryk was already having enough of the whole situation and went ahead with deleting the account. He would soon make a YouTube community post by saying that he wanted to take a break from Discord for a little while with everything going on. He would then receive a call from Wry, pretending to be a friend from school, specifically math class, but Patryk was able to tell it was him and then ended the call. Patryk then sent out the YouTube community post for all to see, causing chaos within the Gondalian community. After a huge outcry from the Gondalians and beyond, Patryk decided that it's best to just get a VPN called TunnelBear, and install Discord once again, this time going under the alias "Patryk (3)" aka "patryk_la_vista". He managed to find Wry's account on Twitter, where he originally started to repost transgender porn, later stopping and eventually coming out to be actually transphobic and moved on to post lighthearted shitposts, and mention Patryk here and there in a few of his Tweets. There was also a hack of Patryk's Columbine Forums account, but luckily he was able to retrieve it. However, this didn't stop Patryk though, because he had another trick up his sleeve. Gabeolo gave Wry's address to Patryk in the server, and came up with the perfect plan to get back at Wry. He decided to send a letter to him, with a picture of him without a shirt on and wearing his V for Vendetta (aka "Anonymous") mask, just like what he did to Stndpzng, and a CD with a song that he and Connor made, called "Wry Is a fag". He then sent off the letter he made on August 9th, waiting to see if it will ever get a response back. Eventually, Wry (under an alt account called "cocktailshaker") and some of his friends from the Federal Troll Agency would join HGE and join a voice call to confront Patryk about sending the letter, making fun of him for doing so and learning that it wasn't Wry that hacked him, it later turned out to be another ghost named "Amber" instead.
Season 2: Death of Heckknok
7/19/2024 - Heckknok's passing
On a seemingly random night server owner #2 and leader of the friend group Heckknok AKA Voltaire AKA Gobulon left nearly every server he was in. This came at a lot of people's surprise but the oldest of fags knew that Connor has been bipolar since his birth. Many people were rightfully afraid of the chaos caused by the large discordian power vacuum, for although he kept in contact with a chosen few Gondalians he seemed as if he would be gone forever. While no one knew why he had done this, we later learned that the action was sprung upon by one of Wry's greatest homosexuals, Jake101, after a conversation about some gay and retarded Miguelian bullshit. While he seems to be missing for now, some say he still has eyes in Gondalia and the general Irony Server scene, ruling it from the shadows... This may not be the last time we hear of this Cordian legend... ... ....
7/25/2024 - The Catman Situation
Catman, a new server member, seemed innocent enough. They were in the server for a small while, and one fateful night at 11:30 PM, they joined the voice call. He turned on his camera, and he looked very young. Around 8-12. WHAT? Suddenly, the kid pulled out something his penis on the call. Why would he do this? We were all traumatized from this incident. Sussyjamaica then created a suspicious invite... and a new member (drakobloxxers_) joined. Cool! But then... this guy also joined the call, turned on his camera, and it was the same kid! Showing it again! Very very strange... NEVER AGAIN GONDAL.
7/27/2024 | 7/30/2024 - The Great Kanyian Migration
On this particular date, Keempa invited the Kanyians to come to Gondal. The Kanyians are local to the east coast, and migrate servers frequently. Majority of them are 13-16, and Greasebeast was against inviting them to the server for this fact alone. However, they joined, and remained for a few days. They were active, and joined in chat and calls occasionally. They were removed by Keempa and Greasebeast shortly after their introduction to the server.
Season 3: Dictatorship
8/4/2024 - The 8/4/24 Incident
The 8/4/24 Incident included a new individual that goes by Norman Helmuth Eiche, otherwise known as Sergeant Eiche. He is the founder of the Federal Republic of Normandia (FRN) political party, and was democratically elected as the first president for this server after winning the election. At first, everything seemed like it was going well, until his pal RedDark, who is apparently one of his friends irl and happens to be an Estonian furry Team Fortress 2 addict that was secretly disguised as the popular YouTuber Markiplier, wanted Eiche to invite his shitty nuke bot that was called "FRN BOT" to the server. RedDark forced him to always trust him as a "friend", who would then convince him that his nuke bot was "secure" and kept begging him to add it. After Eiche was constantly pressured by him, he decided to just add the bot because he thought that it would just follow and enforce his policies, which is to "wipe out furries and gooners". 10 minutes after he invited the bot, it would start to slowly delete channels while staff members that were active at the time noticed what was happening and did whatever they could to stop the nuke bot. RedDark would then go on to make fun of Eiche in his DMs by saying "WHAT THE HELL BRO" and "FUCK YOU HAHAHAHAHA". At first, everyone thought that Eiche was the one who nuked Gondal, but it turns out that RedDark had access to his entire computer and "controlled" him by using software called Parsec. Because of this, Eiche was immediately impeached, disqualified from participating in any more elections, and was temporarily banned. It was also discovered that RedDark's true intentions to nuke the server was because he thought it was full of racists and pedophiles. However, RedDark is not able to sense irony and found out that the server is in fact NOT filled with racists and pedophiles.
With the server now in ruins, Ara’s friend Ignasijus gave himself admin perms after Ara forgot to remove the role management perms he gave him while back, in hopes of fixing the server himself. Ignasijus would then start overusing his new powers by banning the most active members blindly, which turned out to be an unpopular decision. Eventually, Ara told him to stop due to Gondalians starting to protest against him and said he shouldn't use his powers at all, which he has stuck to for the most part. The President role was also given to Patryk, who would then be voted off by the newly elected council after he started abusing his perms. With all hope seemed lost, Ignasijus decided it would be best to give Hans the second highest role in the server so that the HGE can finally recover from the nuke. However, Everr didn't really like what was happening, saying that the server should just be deleted and shut down so that a new one can be started up since he believed that the server is more active when it is in danger, stating that servers should always be "fragile" and "at risk". This isn't the only way to make it active, but only just the most destructive way possible. He also said it should be shut down because its too Heckknok-centric and mostly because of the fact that Ignas still had the highest role. He would then close the server for a little while so that it could be archived, but then Ara came back and reopened the server because he did not agree with most of the points Everr was making, stating the server still has potential.
8/10/2024 - The Second Presidential Election
The participants for the Second Presidential Election would be Greasebeast, Celena, mog, and Pai. Eiche was also allowed to participate in the elections solely because many would expect him to lose due to what happened in the 8/4/24 Incident. He wouldn't give up hope though, claiming that he has over 968 friends that would all vote for him. Eiche would then show off a Snapchat group chat with someone that would add all of his supposed "friends", which were actually just a bunch of random people. When the voting link was given out in the announcements channel, he started flooding the votes with fake entries in an attempt to rig the entire election. He also included many users such as Gabeolo and Cliff Burkett to vote for him, despite them never actually voting for him. After this was found out, he was immediately disqualified and all votes going towards him were nullified. He was then confronted about the rigging, only for him to say he's done with Gondal politics and that he gives up.
The winners of the elections would be Celena of the United Anti-Fur Movement (UAFM) party being elected as president with a total of 17 votes and Greasebeast of the Thenetic Grease Al-jamhawariyeh party being elected as the vice president. Celena began her presidency with a most likely AI-generated speech, thanking everyone that voted for her and making it clear that furries and gooners "will be erased". She would then make an admin only channel called "staff-furry-rp" to have a personal roleplaying session with everyone that had admin perms. The channel ended up getting leaked, causing mass hysteria within the Gondal community, making Celena end up addressing the issue by saying it's not real and to not talk about it at all. Her final act as presidency would be attempting to declare "war" on the Irony Wiki server, which turned out to be a HUGE unpopular decision since the server supported Gondalian infrastructure (our wiki) and was a breach of Gondalian civil rights. She would then be impeached by the council because of her stupid decision, with her presidency going to Pai. The only impactful thing she has done for this server is getting mad whenever people "gembait" reacted her messages, which many users found to be extremely hilarious.
8/14/2024 - Sigma Rizzus' Selfbots
On the 14th, former vice-president and council member Sigma Rizzus would make a Selfbot on his account that would spam the phrase "you are not a boykisser you are 11 do your homework😭" every single time the words "femboy" or "uwu" would be posted into chat. This led to most members spamming "femboy" in chat to activate the bot, leading to Discord temporarily IP banning Sigma Rizzus and his bot getting rate limited. Luckily, he was able to make a new account and decided to make another selfbot. He would then add a new command called "houdini", which would spam some lyrics from Eminem's popular song Houdini from his recent album The Death of Slim Shady (Coup de Grâce) whenever anyone replied to one of his messages with the phrase. His selfbots would be later deactivated due to the amount of newgens losing all self control and spamming it with @everyone pings. Can't have NOTHING with these mfs.
Season 4: Goon 4 Me
8/27/2024 - The Gondal Website
Sigma Rizzus believed that creating a website for Gondal would be a great idea to keep Gondalians connected in case of something bad ever happening to the server. He stated that the purpose of the website was to "expand Gondal", meaning that he wanted to create other safe spaces for Gondalians to expand the presence of Gondal everywhere. He also decided to create a news source for the server called BGN, which stands for Basic Gondal News. However, it appears that every article written on the BGN is only from his point of view, which could lead to misinformation and missing pieces in the information being shared. Although the website was a work in progress, Sigma Rizzus would end up deleting the website after getting his council removed for attempting to ban Eiche and some of the bots. However, this website was reinstated and has been running today.
8/30/2024 - Milan Incident
During the night of August 30th, a new user named milan_333__ joined the server and his first message was "THIS SERVER IS RAN BY PEDOPHOBES @everr." The only active user at the time was Celena, who became confused and uncomfortable upon seeing this message, but didn't think much of it as such behavior was considered part of Gondalian culture. Patryk then joined the conversation to see what was happening, after which milan_333__ proceeded to send a video of human feces ice cream while asking him, "Do you want a bite?" This indicated that milan_333__ could possibly either be a member of Gondal, or atleast knew about Patryk, given his knowledge of the Cherokee Incident. Patryk was deeply disgusted by this and decided to tell him off by blocking him. He also asked Everr to ban milan_333__, but it appeared that Everr was asleep during the time this whole event was unfolding.
After a few minutes, milan_333__ would then send a mortifying message containing child pornography. Celena, who was planning to log off Discord and concentrate on her never-ending chemistry classes, came across the disturbing piece of media, which deeply upset her. Upon discovering this unpleasant content, she frantically tried to contact an admin that seemed to be online. The first admin she contacted was Everr, who left no response obviously from him being asleep. The second admin she tried to contact was Ara, who also did not reply. Losing hope, she contacted the third and last admin, Z3TA, who thankfully responded promptly and dealt with the pedophile swiftly.
The aftermath of this catastrophe was the general chat being archived and getting replaced by a new one. A new rule also emerged, stating that anyone who joked about child pornography will be punished by being banished to the VOID. The heroes of this story is Celena, whose quick actions in alerting an admin, and Z3TA for banning and getting rid of the pedophile. STAY AWAY PEDOS!!