The Holy Gondal Empire is the latest server in Gondal's story. It was formed by merging two split-off servers, Kevinia and Red Cup Conspiracy, after Gondal: From The Ashes was archived due to constant raids by pedophiles who spammed child pornography on the former server. The latest entry in Irony servers, bringing it back from the dead!
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| Server info | |
|---|---|
| Status | Active |
| Invite link | https://discord.gg/hawktuah |
| Users | 140+ |
| Owner | ara, Heckknok and everr |
| History | |
| Founded | July 14th, 2024 |
| Founder | ara |
Season 0: Red Kevinian Cup
07/14/2024 - The Conception
During this date, three great minds came together with a simple idea: a server merge of the greats. Ara, representing Gondal: From the Ashes, Heckknok, representing Red Cup, and Everr, representing Kevinia come together to create a father server, hosting both many newgens and many controversies.
Season 1: Holy Gondal Empire
7/15/2024 - Patryk Vs Stndpzng
For the first event of Holy Gondal Empire as we know it, Gondalian Administration decided to start big. It was to be a sort of gladiatorial battle for reintegration into Gondal, a vc battle for the very right to live. In one corner you had Patryk Kornatowski, a verifiable juggernaut, weighing in at over 372 pounds and perhaps one of, if not the, greatest lolcow in irony history. Arrested for uncountable crimes, including drinking his own bodily fluids, covering himself in shit, attempting to dox several high ranking members, and having a questionable presence with sexual content featuring underage characters. In the other corner is the Las Vegas native and elder Gondalian Standpissing, a formerly highly influential man involved in many of the greatest Irony servers and Irony movements. He is held on trial for explaining Gondal lore to his IRL crush, hanging out with trannies, and worst of all just generally being annoying as shit. The two had feuded in the past, Standpissing having been involved with an 8chan hacker who threatened Patryk's life and home address. This was more personal. On the day of the 15th, Patryk had developed a habit of muting everyone else in the vc and just talking to himself, something that proved detrimental during the battle. When Standpissing arrived, Patryk was already distressed, making Standpissing's job very easy. Due to everyone being muted by the contestants the best way to communicate with them was through spamming general chat, causing it to look closer to a Twitch chat than a conversation. The turnout was good, around 15 or so people arrived and multiple were recording the event. Patryk was up against the ropes for the majority of the match. He had muted himself and would just sit there as Standpissing racked up "points" and occasionally attempted to reason with him. Patryk would only unmute to spout lines either given to him by Heckknok or taken from the spammed general chat. Multiple times Patryk would receive very important tips and tricks from the adoring crowd such as Standpissing's many home addresses including local Sears and Taco Bell locations, they also helped Patryk avoid 8chan hacking attacks by turning his camera on and unmuting. Despite these efforts, the villainous and evil Standpissing still had the clear lead. It took a 3rd quarter pep talk from Cliff Burkett to inform Patryk of his upcoming loss and to remind him of the stakes of the situation to get our good ol Autistic King to kick into hyper drive. What happened next was beyond description. Patryk turned on his camera, took off his shirt, donned his Iconic V for Vendetta mask, and began to shake his large drooping breasts for all to see. This clearly blew Standpissing out of the water and he had no hope of recovering. Somehow, Patryk had done it, to the applause of all of his adoring fans in the server, and Standpissing was vanquished forever. All of this footage exists somewhere and Everr is supposed to have edited by now. Please harass Everr until his video is done.
Season 2: Death of Heckknok
7/19/2024 - Heckknok's passing
On a seemingly random night server owner #2 and leader of the friend group Heckknok AKA Voltaire AKA Gobulon left nearly every server he was in. This came at a lot of people's surprise but the oldest of fags knew that Connor has been bipolar since his birth. Many people were rightfully afraid of the chaos caused by the large discordian power vacuum, for although he kept in contact with a chosen few Gondalians he seemed as if he would be gone forever. While no one knew why he had done this, some people later learned that the action was sprung upon by one of Wry's greatest homosexuals, Jake101, after a conversation about some gay and retarded Miguelian bullshit. While he seems to be missing for now, some say he still has eyes in Gondalia and the general Irony Server scene, ruling it from the shadows... This may not be the last time we hear of this Cordian legend... ... ....
7/25/2024 - The Catman Situation
Catman, a new server member, seemed innocent enough. They were in the server for a small while, and one fateful night at 11:30 PM, they joined the voice call. He turned on his camera, and he looked very young. Around 8-12. WHAT? Suddenly, the kid pulled out something his penis on the call. Why would he do this? We were all traumatized from this incident. Sussyjamacia then created a suspicious invite... and a new member (drakobloxxers_) joined. Cool! But then... this guy also joined the call, turned on his camera, and it was the same kid! Showing it again! Very very strange... NEVER AGAIN GONDAL.
7/27/2024 | 7/30/2024 - The Great Kanyian Migration
On this particular date, Keempa invited the Kanyians to come to Gondal. The Kanyians are local to the east coast, and migrate servers frequently. Majority of them are 13-16, and Greasebeast was against inviting them to the server for this fact alone. However, they joined, and remained for a few days. They were active, and joined in chat and calls occasionally. They were removed by Keempa and Greasebeast shortly after their introduction to the server.
Season 3: Dictatorship
8/4/2024 - The 8/4/24 Incident
The 8/4/24 Incident included a new individual that goes by Norman Helmuth Eiche, otherwise known as Sergeant Eiche. He is the founder of the Federal Republic of Normandia (FRN) political party, and was democratically elected as the first president for this server after winning the election. At first, everything seemed like it was going well, until his pal RedDark, who is apparently one of his friends irl and happens to be an Estonian furry Team Fortress 2 addict that was secretly disguised as the popular YouTuber Markiplier, wanted Eiche to invite his shitty nuke bot that was called "FRN BOT" to the server. RedDark forced him to always trust him as a "friend", who would then convince him that his nuke bot was "secure" and kept begging him to add it. After Eiche was constantly pressured by him, he decided to just add the bot because he thought that it would just follow and enforce his policies, which is to "wipe out furries and gooners". 10 minutes after he invited the bot, it would start to slowly delete channels while staff members that were active at the time noticed what was happening and did whatever they could to stop the nuke bot. RedDark would then go on to make fun of Eiche in his DMs by saying "WHAT THE HELL BRO" and "FUCK YOU HAHAHAHAHA". At first, everyone thought that Eiche was the one who nuked Gondal, but it turns out that RedDark had access to his entire computer and "controlled" him by using software called Parsec. Because of this, Eiche was immediately impeached, disqualified from participating in any more elections, and was temporarily banned. It was also discovered that RedDark's true intentions to nuke the server was because he thought it was full of racists and pedophiles. However, RedDark is not able to sense irony and found out that the server is in fact NOT filled with racists and pedophiles.
With the server now in ruins, Ara’s friend Ignasijus gave himself admin perms after Ara forgot to remove the role management perms he gave him while back, in hopes of fixing the server himself. Ignasijus would then start overusing his new powers by banning the most active members blindly, which turned out to be an unpopular decision. Eventually, Ara told him to stop due to Gondalians starting to protest against him and said he shouldn't use his powers at all, which he has stuck to for the most part. The President role was also given to Patryk, who would then be voted off by the newly elected council after he started abusing his perms. With all hope seemed lost, Ignasijus decided it would be best to give Hans the second highest role in the server so that the HGE can finally recover from the nuke. However, Everr didn't really like what was happening, saying that the server should just be deleted and shut down so that a new one can be started up since he believed that the server is more active when it is in danger, stating that servers should always be "fragile" and "at risk". This isn't the only way to make it active, but only just the most destructive way possible. He also said it should be shut down because its too Heckknok-centric and mostly because of the fact that Ignas still had the highest role. He would then close the server for a little while so that it could be archived, but then Ara came back and reopened the server because he did not agree with most of the points Everr was making, stating the server still has potential.
8/10/2024 - Presidential Election
The elections began!