Holy Gondal Empire: Difference between revisions

| users = 270+

| owner = ara, Heckknok and everr

The '''Holy Gondal Empire''', formerly known as '''Red Kevinian Cup''' and '''Gondal: Thenite Republic''', respectively, is the latest server in Gondal's story. It was formed by merging two split-off servers, [[Kevinia]] and Red Cup Conspiracy, after [[Gondal: From The Ashes]] was archived due to constant raids by pedophiles who spammed child pornography on the former server. The latest entry in Irony servers, bringing it back from the dead!

For the first event of Holy Gondal Empire as we know it, Gondalian Administration decided to start big. It was to be a sort of gladiatorial battle for reintegration into Gondal, a vc battle for the very right to live. In one corner you had [[Patryk|Patryk Kornatowski]], a verifiable juggernaut, weighing in at over 372 pounds and perhaps one of, if not the, greatest lolcow in irony history. Arrested for uncountable crimes, including drinking his own bodily fluids, covering himself in shit, attempting to dox several high ranking members, and having a questionable presence with sexual content featuring underage characters. In the other corner is the Las Vegas native and elder Gondalian Standpissing, a formerly highly influential man involved in many of the greatest Irony servers and Irony movements. He is held on trial for explaining Gondal lore to his IRL crush, hanging out with trannies, and worst of all just generally being annoying as shit. The two had feuded in the past, Standpissing having been involved with an 8chan hacker who threatened Patryk's life and home address. This was more personal. On the day of the 15th, [[Patryk]] had developed a habit of muting everyone else in the vc and just talking to himself, something that proved detrimental during the battle. When Standpissing arrived, [[Patryk]] was already distressed, making Standpissing's job very easy. Due to everyone being muted by the contestants the best way to communicate with them was through spamming general chat, causing it to look closer to a Twitch chat than a conversation. The turnout was good, around 15 or so people arrived and multiple were recording the event. [[Patryk]] was up against the ropes for the majority of the match. He had muted himself and would just sit there as Standpissing racked up "points" and occasionally attempted to reason with him. [[Patryk]] would only unmute to spout lines either given to him by Heckknok or taken from the spammed general chat. Multiple times [[Patryk]] would receive very important tips and tricks from the adoring crowd such as Standpissing's many home addresses including local Sears, Taco Bell, and IHOP locations, they also helped [[Patryk]] avoid 8chan hacking attacks by turning his camera on and unmuting. Despite these efforts, the villainous and evil Standpissing still had the clear lead. It took a 3rd quarter pep talk from Cliff Burkett to inform Patryk of his upcoming loss and to remind him of the stakes of the situation to get our good ol' Autistic King to kick into hyper drive. What happened next was beyond description. [[Patryk]] turned on his camera, took off his shirt, donned his Iconic V for Vendetta mask, and began to shake his large drooping breasts for all to see. This clearly blew Standpissing out of the water and he had no hope of recovering. Somehow, [[Patryk]] had done it, to the applause of all of his adoring fans in the server, and Standpissing was vanquished forever. All of this footage exists somewhere and [[Everr]] is supposed to have edited by now. Please harass [[Everr]] until his video is done.

This party was led by [[Celblx|Celena]], who was both the second president in the HGE and first president to get impeached in the server. Her goal was to "rid Gondal of furries", despite being a closeted furry herself, but it seemed she was already unpopular due to her previous presidential decisions. She would then lose her only supporter when [[Hans]] pointed out her flaws and unpopular actions when she was president, leaving the party with ZERO members.

The Joker Party, being led by [[Gabeolo]] who is a very well-known oldgen within Gondal and has witnessed the catfishing of [[Bangshakalaka]], planned to take Gondal into new, exciting directions and to spit on "do-gooders" like [[Patryk]] (''see "[[Holy Gondal Empire#9/2/24 - The Joker Virus|The Joker Virus]]" for more info''). Gabeolo also had a patriotic supporter known as Magneto who somehow had perms within the server and would ban or demote anyone who didn't vote for the Joker Party.